My daughter’s daycare provides meals, once infants become toddlers.  In fact, eating table food is a requirement for moving up to the next level.  Princess has actually been eating table foods since she was about nine months old.  She wasn’t eating hearty meals like mommy and daddy, but I’d modify everything so that she can easy chew and swallow.  For instance, instead of giving her a chicken leg, I’d cut up it up into tiny pieces for her.

Even though lunch and snacks are provided at daycare, I like to prepare her meals myself (aka brown bagging it).  One of the requirements for brown bagging it involves preparing the food within 24 hours of being eaten.  Since I work the evening shift, I’m usually able to make my baby’s lunch fresh each day.  Not only is she eating freshly prepared meals, she’s also getting the right nutrients.  Her meals usually consist of fresh fruits and veggies, whole wheat, gluten free and whole grain bread, chicken, whole grain or brown rice pasta, whole wheat wraps, hummus, just to name a few.  I’m no health nut, but I try to make the right choices for my baby girl.  I also believe it’s a great alternative to the foods being offered at her daycare. 

I made the commitment early on to breastfeed, so it’s only right that I continue making healthy choices for her.  Everything has been working out fine with her meals, but I’ve recently been feeling pressure from the daycare to take advantage of what’s on their menu.  They’ve brought it up a few months ago and I politely declined.  But since Princess has moved to the toddler room, they’ve applied more pressure.  I’ve made every attempt to avoid the having her eat off the menu completely, but I have decided to meet them “half way” as they asked.  There are some things that are ok for her to have like yogurt, goldfish, animal crackers, cheez-its.  I know that some of these snacks are exactly the healthiest, but I do believe in allowing treats in moderation.  Plus, Princess is able to take advantage of the menu.  She’s happy, I’m happy, and everybody’s happy, or so I thought.  I was recently appoached again to give my baby items off of the menu.  This time I was bit more stern with my words and told the lady that I was happy with the arrangements I’ve already made.  She then asked about the concerns I had regarding the menu.  I responded that I rather give my daughter fresh fruits and veggies rather than canned fruits and veggies.  Other items on the menu include, chicken nuggets, hamburgers, tater tots, turkey.  I am in no way judging what parents choose to feed their children.  Everyone is different.  But, I don’t like feeling pressure to conform to what some may feel is the norm.  When I asked why they insist on the kids eating what’s on the menu, I was told that it upsets the other children.  “The kids want what she’s having and she wants what they’re having, so it’s easier to have everyone on the same meal plan.  Plus it’s easier for you,” she said.  I wanted to scream!!  I can’t understand why they’re giving me such a hard time about this.  Those who know me personally, are well aware that I can be very direct.  In this moment,  I chose to walk away to avoid saying something that I would probably regret.  I have such a great relationship with this daycare and my little Princess loves going there and I didn’t want to jeopardize that. 

I waited until I cooled off and then called and speak to someone.  I explained again what my concerns were and the lady recommended that I bring in foods that are similar to what is being served that day.  She also asked that I speak with the person in charge of preparing the foods.  Long story short, I spoke with her and I feel the same way I felt before.  I understand that my daughter may cry for the other babies foods and vice versa.  As parents it’s our job to teach our kids that you can’t always get what you want.  I hate to sound harsh.  But there will be many more times when I’d have to explain to my daughter that she can’t have what the other kids are having.  One day she’ll want the same jacket that all the girls in her school are wearing, or she wants to wear make up.  It’s my job as a parent to tell her she’s not allowed or she can’t wear what everyone’s wearing.  I plan to explain to her that I make decisions in order to protect her, not to hurt her.  I know that there may be rough times, but I can only hope that someday she’ll understand.  I may be way ahead of myself, however, I believe that these life lessons start immediately.  Princess is only one-year-old and like any other child, she’ll cry for things she’s not allowed to have.  If I give in now, she may expect to get everything she wants and that’s not gonna happen. 

I do believe in compromise, as I mentioned previously.  While she may be allowed a few things off of the menu, I have to stay strong and stick to my guns.  You often hear about unhealthy lunches in schools.  But it’s such a shame that these kids are sujected to unhealthy choices this early in the game.