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Torn

Princess is getting so big, and she’s finally sleeping through the night!  But, why am I not ecstatic?  I thought I’d being jumping over the moon, and excited to be getting more sleep.  But, I’m sad.

I knew it would eventually happen.  I’m having the most trouble with the fact that she no longer needs me at night.  I know your probably thinking I’m insane for feeling this way.  But, I can’t help it.  Don’t get it twisted, I’m not one of those helicopter moms.  Hovering is not my thing.  I want Princess to be independent.  I don’t want her to be attached to my hip every second of the day.

I think my feelings stem from my overall time spent with her–or lack there of.  I recently had to take some days of from work, and it hit me.  Being able to spend my evenings with her and putting her to bed made be realize what I’ve been missing.  It’s crazy how much she’s developing!  What’s even crazier is the fact that she’s a completely different toddler in the morning than she is at night.  The Princess I get in the morning can be a bit cranky.  She loves to cuddle, and hates getting dressed.  At night she’s playful, loves to sing, and run around the house.  She’s at that stage where she’s repeating everything.  Now that I’ve returned to work, I feel guilty.

I’m torn between my daughter and my job.  I love them both.  But how do I split my time equally?  People always ask me how I manage to balance everything I do.  Sometimes I ask myself that same question.  Between work, school, and Princess, it can get pretty tough.  There are days when I feel like I have it all down pat.  But there are times when I feel torn.  I’m gonna have to make some changes.

Do you every feel torn between your job and your kids?

Weather Anchor Mama 

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