My hair journey has hit a little bit of a snag these past couple of months. But, that’s to be expected. It’s interesting how your hair reacts to whatever it is you could be going through. Stress, pregnancy, post pregnancy, nutrition or lack there of — you name it. Despite our trials and tribulations, my hair and I have a great relationship. But our bond wasn’t always solid.
It took me a while to fully embrace my locks. I remember getting so frustrated because my hair wasn’t naturally straight. I hated the way it felt. I couldn’t run my fingers through my hair like those white girls. I remember looking at them and saying, “Damn, why can’t I have hair like that?”
I used to complain about my new growth. My mom would remind me that was my natural hair. I was like, “whatever.” I hated it. I used to beg her to take me to Brooklyn to get my touch up every eight weeks. It was a half hour commute, there was no way I could get there on my own. At 14, I was too young to drive. By the time I was 16, I wasn’t really allowed to drive that far. Needless to say, I was at her mercy.
I’ll never forget the time when I needed to have my senior pictures taken. I begged my mom to take me to the hairdresser to get a relaxer and a cute style. I can’t remember the reason, but she said no. I was pissed!! She insisted on doing it herself. My anger eventually turned to misery. My begging did nothing to change her mind, and I had no choice but to give in. It was either go to school a hot mess and have those horrendous senior pictures for life, or suck it up and have her wash and curl my hair. I chose the latter.
Looking back, I realized that my hair had thinned out so much. My hairdresser had chopped off all the damaged ends a few months prior to taking this photo. My hair continued that same cycle after graduation. I’d get a touch up every few months. It would grow, then I’d have to cut it off, and start over because of heat damage.
Fast forward to my modeling career. Each time I’d book a gig, I’d get nervous about clients wanting to do something to my hair. “Are you willing to cut or color your hair?” That was the typical question asked at all the go-sees. As a model, you never want to be looked at as hard to work with. That was the title given to many girls who didn’t do what the client recommended. I never had to cut or color my hair for a job, but there was always a lot of pulling, weaving, and heat applied during those photo shoots. My hair took a beating. I learned a valuable lesson during that time, which prepared me for my career in television.
I got my big break as the traffic chick for one of the top stations in NYC. I found myself right back at that same place. The hairstylists had ideas for my hair, and I was just not having it. Unlike the situation with my mom, I chose to look a hot mess. My hair had gone through so much that I couldn’t chance it.
I was still getting a touch up every two to three months. I’d wash, roller set, and wrap my hair every weekend. The first few days of the week my hair was flawless. But by midweek, it started to look flat because of my workouts. I gave in to the stations hairstylists on a few occasions, which had negative outcomes. Slowly my hair continued to chip away. Again, periodically I would have to cut off damaged ends and start all over.
Those days are behind me. Now I’m in a much better space. I finally decided to ditch the relaxer in February 2012, and haven’t looked back since. My hair has never felt or looked better. I must admit I was a bit apprehensive when it came to sporting my teeny weeny afro because I’ve always enjoyed having long hair. It’s been a couple of years and my hair is now shoulder length (when stretched). I still wear a wig on-air, but I love rockin’ my natural locks when I’m not working.
I’ve received encouragement from viewers to lose the wig all together. But, I’m not ready for that just yet. I do, however, enjoy the versatility in how I style my hair. Wigs offer a great protective style option. But let’s get one thing straight, I love my hair. Each day I become more amazed at the progress it’s has made, and I’m so glad I made the decision to return to my natural roots. I feel like a whole new me.
