For me, career mom guilt means struggling to balance work and motherhood. I started this blog to document my parenting adventures and share tips with other moms and dads. After over four years, I thought I had this down pat. But, these last couple of years have been tough. I love my job, but I love my kids too. To make matters worse, my little girl said something recently that broke my heart, and makes me want to reevaluate some things.
I was getting Princess ready for school when she said, “Mommy, when you’re not here, I miss you. I look at your picture and wish you were here. I think about you all the time.”
“So, you don’t want me to work anymore?” I asked.
“No,” she responded.
“But if I stopped working, then you won’t be able to hang out with me at work like you did the other day. Would you be okay with that?” I asked.
Princess had so much fun at my job. I was expected her to say no, but she nodded then answered, “yes.” This conversation obviously wasn’t going too well.
Working in the news biz often requires putting in long hours and holidays. Luckily, I rarely work the holidays. When it comes to the weekends, I spend them with my family. In fact, I plan on spending this Mother’s Day with just my husband and kids because we barely see each other during the week.
Despite being ships passing through the night, we’ve managed to make it work. However, talks like this leave me feeling guilty. It isn’t the first time my daughter and I have had this conversation. Here’s a clip from almost two years ago.
As a working mom, sometimes you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. You’re torn between a career you love and a family you love. I remember growing up and missing my Mom too. She also worked long hours as a nurse. There were times she worked up to three jobs. It was a sacrifice that we struggled with as well. But, she really didn’t have much of a choice. I turned out fine and we’re tight to this day. She helps out a lot with the kids and my hubby and I are forever grateful.
If that wasn’t the case, having a career would be even harder than it is now. I’m glad that my kids have her in their lives. As for my parenting dilemma, our chat has given me food for thought. Stay tuned.
Do you ever feel guilty for being a career mom?
aweeee. That is so sweet! Mommy has to work! 🙂
Hey, Stacy-Ann! Ummm….YES! Hands up! I suffer from working mom guilt, too. I have always worked away from home, but recently started blogging full-time this past January. We took the kids out of daycare to help make things more affordable on the reduced income, and things have been going great. But the guilt is always there–guilt when I have to work and devote time to my blog and do-it-yourself projects, and when i “ignore” my kids for the sake of needing to work. The thing is that when I was working full-time away from home, I saw my kids maybe 3 hours a day. Now, I am with them all day (even if working, still only a few steps away). But I can’t ever let go of the guilt that I’m not giving them enough time, enough focus, enough love, enough moments where I’m not like “Okay, boys, hurry up and get in bed, Mommy’s gotta work!”
I am coming to the realization that there will never be a non-guilt moment as a mom as long as we have careers. Simple as that. I think we just have to make efforts to be there when we can, and know that they’ll grow up just fine, and will probably only remember the fun times we have and not the “I-wish-Mommy-wasn’t-working” times. 🙂
Great post! And your daughter is adorable!!
Serena
Thrift Diving
Mom guilt is a tough one – that’s why it’s key to evolve and make our careers fit our lifestyle. Maybe news hours are too tough but there are tons of other freelance jobs! Life takes you where you are supposed to go, and emotions change. good luck with your decision…it’s never easy.