Everyday I ask Princess about her day. She usually responds by giving me a play by play of the day in question. Most recently, I notice her holding back, which made me question – should I worry my daughter’s keeping secrets from me?
Like every other night, I get a call from my mom with a rundown of what transpired that evening, after picking the kids up from school. She proceeded to tell me about a moment that brought my daughter to tears.
She told my mom that a friend at school said she no longer wanted to be friends. My little girl was so crushed that she began bawling.
Grandma said exactly what I would have in that moment.
“If she doesn’t want to be friends with you, that’s okay. You have Mommy, Daddy, Grandma…” she assured her.
“But I don’t know why she doesn’t want to be my friend,” she cried.
My mom went on to tell her that she’ll have plenty more friends, and started naming some of the other classmates Princess has grown very fond of.
The next morning, I asked Princess – “How was your day yesterday?”
“Good,” she responded.
“Did anything happen,” I asked.
“No,” she said.
“Was everyone nice to each other,” I asked.
“Yes,” she relied.
Really? Grandma got waterworks, and I got nothing? Princess didn’t mention anything about the conversation she had with my mom. Rather than bring it up, I changed the subject.
Surprisingly, my feelings weren’t hurt. In fact, I’m glad she was able to confide in her Grandma. I’ve always assured that it’s okay to tell me anything.
I always tell her, “Even if you think I’ll get upset, it’s okay. Always remember that I’m here for you – no matter what.” I’ve also stated that if for some reason you can’t talk to me, it’s okay to talk to Daddy or Grandma.
I say this knowing the information will get back to me anyway, but I also want her to know that she has family who’s there to support her.
As it turns out, a week later she told me what happened with her now former friend.
“If someone doesn’t want to be your friend, remember that you have plenty more friends to play with,” I assured her.
What would you do if you found out your child is keeping secrets?
